








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 354 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 154 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2023 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,545 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1233 | 19% |
| Smokes | 2229 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 1399 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1684 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $194,302 of utility $41 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 24 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cal | 69% | 16 |
| #2 | F1NCH | 62% | 13 |
| #3 | meh. | 57% | 14 |
| #4 | Shad!X | 57% | 60 |
| #5 | Just PooPoo | 56% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | F1NCH | 5 | 0.0181 |
| #2 | iddqd | 3 | 0.0030 |
| #3 | Just PooPoo | 3 | 0.0078 |
| #4 | ♿IamLegend♿ | 2 | 0.0033 |
| #5 | cal | 2 | 0.0060 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | F1NCH | +6.00 | 90 | 63 |
| #2 | Lunecron | +2.67 | 73 | 54 |
| #3 | DrFunny | +2.40 | 73 | 71 |
| #4 | cal | +0.65 | 66 | 68 |
| #5 | Just PooPoo | +0.45 | 65 | 51 |





