








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 495 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 474 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 18 matches | ||
| Faceit | 18 matches | ||
| Wingman | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 32 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




32 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6524 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 25,814 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6824 | 26% |
| Smokes | 8347 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 4674 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 5969 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,532,791 of utility $112 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 159 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Just PooPoo | 64% | 56 |
| #2 | Lunecron | 57% | 60 |
| #3 | F1NCH | 53% | 83 |
| #4 | Combat | 53% | 87 |
| #5 | Jumperrino | 51% | 209 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Jumperrino | 51% | 209 |
| #6 | iddqd | 50% | 409 |
| #7 | cal | 49% | 166 |
| #8 | ♿IamLegend♿ | 47% | 59 |
| #9 | meh. | 44% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | iddqd | 48 | 0.0056 |
| #2 | cal | 24 | 0.0069 |
| #3 | F1NCH | 11 | 0.0062 |
| #4 | Jumperrino | 6 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | Lunecron | 4 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | iddqd | 1520 | 0.18 | 43 min |
| #2 | Jumperrino | 686 | 0.15 | 16 min |
| #3 | cal | 504 | 0.14 | 12 min |
| #4 | F1NCH | 301 | 0.17 | 8 min |
| #5 | Combat | 187 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | F1NCH | +6.03 | 87 | 66 |
| #2 | Lunecron | +2.41 | 62 | 54 |
| #3 | Just PooPoo | +2.07 | 57 | 43 |
| #4 | cal | +0.58 | 65 | 60 |
| #5 | iddqd | +0.40 | 57 | 65 |





