








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 263 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 158 matches | ||
| Faceit | 45 matches | ||
| Wingman | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 34 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2284 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,991 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2914 | 22% |
| Smokes | 3541 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 3212 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 3324 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,069,759 of utility $134 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 125 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zendiz | 69% | 26 |
| #2 | KATUHAKKAAJA | 69% | 26 |
| #3 | weega | 57% | 112 |
| #4 | peku | 55% | 193 |
| #5 | Janzzoni | 54% | 97 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | peku | 7 | 0.0017 |
| #2 | weega | 6 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | John McClane | 6 | 0.0053 |
| #4 | RoX | 3 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | Janzzoni | 2 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | peku | 739 | 0.18 | 19 min |
| #2 | weega | 269 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #3 | John McClane | 221 | 0.20 | 5 min |
| #4 | RoX | 186 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #5 | Deathwish | 140 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KATUHAKKAAJA | +5.58 | 78 | 72 |
| #2 | Zendiz | +2.18 | 61 | 56 |
| #3 | defafaa | +1.77 | 43 | 69 |
| #4 | John McClane | +1.05 | 57 | 71 |
| #5 | |KVLT|Nightmare | +0.59 | 69 | 60 |





