








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 879 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 240 matches | ||
| Faceit | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 28 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3091 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,188 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2180 | 19% |
| Smokes | 3544 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 3225 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 2239 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,863,711 of utility $217 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 15 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | avail | 54% | 97 |
| #2 | Deathwish | 53% | 191 |
| #3 | peku | 52% | 110 |
| #4 | weega | 51% | 137 |
| #5 | defafaa | 51% | 83 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | peku | 5 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | Deathwish | 4 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | defafaa | 4 | 0.0023 |
| #4 | weega | 2 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | avail | 1 | 0.0005 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | peku | 440 | 0.19 | 12 min |
| #2 | weega | 288 | 0.10 | 9 min |
| #3 | avail | 218 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #4 | Deathwish | 195 | 0.05 | 5 min |
| #5 | defafaa | 164 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | defafaa | +2.64 | 43 | 69 |
| #2 | RoX | +0.96 | 49 | 69 |
| #3 | avail | +0.44 | 34 | 60 |
| #4 | weega | +0.40 | 41 | 72 |
| #5 | Deathwish | +0.06 | 54 | 65 |





