








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 85 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 128 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 84 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 74 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 69 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 59 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3376 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,476 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2496 | 22% |
| Smokes | 3528 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 3760 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 1692 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $935,744 of utility $82 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 61 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | reme | 50% | 50 |
| #2 | Aciri | 50% | 62 |
| #3 | Reta | 49% | 268 |
| #4 | SW!NK | 47% | 341 |
| #5 | zyn | 43% | 341 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | SW!NK | 47% | 341 |
| #5 | zyn | 43% | 341 |
| #6 | Phlogiston | 42% | 59 |
| #7 | Game Honey | 39% | 97 |
| #8 | koysi^ | 38% | 78 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zyn | 11 | 0.0016 |
| #2 | Reta | 10 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | SW!NK | 9 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | koysi^ | 3 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | Aciri | 3 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Reta | 944 | 0.17 | 19 min |
| #2 | zyn | 918 | 0.14 | 18 min |
| #3 | SW!NK | 723 | 0.11 | 12 min |
| #4 | Game Honey | 125 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #5 | koysi^ | 119 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | reme | +4.53 | 87 | 55 |
| #2 | Reta | +4.07 | 67 | 62 |
| #3 | Aciri | +2.12 | 82 | 48 |
| #4 | zyn | +0.67 | 59 | 51 |
| #5 | SW!NK | -0.57 | 63 | 49 |





