










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 36 matches | ||
| Faceit | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2126 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,063 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1360 | 27% |
| Smokes | 1348 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1292 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1063 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $550,434 of utility $109 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 869 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Miguel Jose Jesus Gonzales Smith | 71% | 14 |
| #2 | Sunraku | 66% | 44 |
| #3 | nuke sweden | 61% | 46 |
| #4 | el hurensohn | 58% | 60 |
| #5 | yup | 57% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sibylle | 12 | 0.0066 |
| #2 | nuke sweden | 9 | 0.0124 |
| #3 | el hurensohn | 8 | 0.0067 |
| #4 | yup | 6 | 0.0157 |
| #5 | DEMACIA!!!!!!! | 5 | 0.0049 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kerim | 128 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #2 | sibylle | 119 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #3 | nuke sweden | 102 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #4 | el hurensohn | 98 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #5 | DEMACIA!!!!!!! | 66 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ^4C h r i s | +2.88 | 83 | 45 |
| #2 | sibylle | +2.79 | 86 | 46 |
| #3 | el hurensohn | +2.56 | 88 | 53 |
| #4 | nuke sweden | +2.47 | 86 | 66 |
| #5 | Sunraku | +1.98 | 76 | 50 |





