








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 46 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Premier | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
803 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,534 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 353 | 23% |
| Smokes | 276 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 467 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 438 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $67,564 of utility $39 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 9 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jolan;b | 65% | 17 |
| #2 | matku | 62% | 47 |
| #3 | NIXU | 61% | 18 |
| #4 | Lepi | 56% | 9 |
| #5 | Redyz ^_^ | 54% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Redyz ^_^ | 54% | 28 |
| #6 | zei | 53% | 19 |
| #7 | Snake | 45% | 20 |
| #8 | 66 | 44% | 39 |
| #9 | Blomster | 20% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jolan;b | 5 | 0.0144 |
| #2 | matku | 4 | 0.0042 |
| #3 | 66 | 4 | 0.0054 |
| #4 | Redyz ^_^ | 3 | 0.0052 |
| #5 | Snake | 2 | 0.0051 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | matku | 187 | 0.20 | 5 min |
| #2 | 66 | 76 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #3 | zei | 41 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #4 | NIXU | 31 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #5 | Redyz ^_^ | 30 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zei | +4.19 | 95 | 45 |
| #2 | NIXU | +3.88 | 83 | 63 |
| #3 | Redyz ^_^ | +3.49 | 89 | 31 |
| #4 | matku | +1.18 | 75 | 76 |
| #5 | Stephen Curry | +0.78 | 70 | 50 |





