








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 282 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 159 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 20 matches | ||
| Premier | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2662 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,648 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5308 | 42% |
| Smokes | 3563 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 992 | 8% |
| Molotovs | 2785 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,137,849 of utility $152 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 120 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ray | 53% | 19 |
| #2 | drink | 46% | 243 |
| #3 | flux | 45% | 227 |
| #4 | M16man66 | 45% | 146 |
| #5 | Beatwood | 45% | 257 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | drink | 46% | 243 |
| #3 | flux | 45% | 227 |
| #4 | M16man66 | 45% | 146 |
| #5 | Beatwood | 45% | 257 |
| #6 | Xyan | 44% | 143 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Beatwood | 7 | 0.0013 |
| #2 | M16man66 | 7 | 0.0024 |
| #3 | drink | 4 | 0.0008 |
| #4 | flux | 4 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Beatwood | 813 | 0.15 | 20 min |
| #2 | drink | 766 | 0.15 | 21 min |
| #3 | M16man66 | 606 | 0.21 | 19 min |
| #4 | flux | 476 | 0.10 | 12 min |
| #5 | Xyan | 309 | 0.10 | 11 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Xyan | +1.67 | 80 | 75 |
| #2 | drink | +1.25 | 54 | 74 |
| #3 | flux | +0.09 | 72 | 60 |
| #4 | TimOT | -0.01 | 68 | 68 |
| #5 | ray | -0.25 | 69 | 38 |





