








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 151 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 47 matches | ||
| Wingman | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1789 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,304 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1906 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1975 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 821 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 1602 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $345,173 of utility $85 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 71 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M I L K | 70% | 89 |
| #2 | focus | 59% | 17 |
| #3 | Timbaboe | 58% | 12 |
| #4 | dink | 53% | 17 |
| #5 | McTash | 50% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M I L K | 70% | 89 |
| #2 | focus | 59% | 17 |
| #3 | Timbaboe | 58% | 12 |
| #4 | dink | 53% | 17 |
| #5 | McTash | 50% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M I L K | 1 | 0.0006 |
| #2 | focus | 1 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | dink | 1 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | McTash | 1 | 0.0038 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | focus | 67 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| #2 | M I L K | 66 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #3 | Timbaboe | 36 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #4 | McTash | 32 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #5 | dink | 31 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M I L K | +5.10 | 87 | 42 |
| #2 | Billy Bread | +2.48 | 68 | 64 |
| #3 | Timbaboe | +1.64 | 85 | 62 |
| #4 | dink | +0.76 | 90 | 57 |
| #5 | McTash | -0.93 | 55 | 57 |





