








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 865 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 466 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 173 matches | ||
| Faceit | 133 matches | ||
| Premier | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
10431 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,901 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3438 | 19% |
| Smokes | 3072 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 6860 | 38% |
| Molotovs | 4531 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,986,717 of utility $168 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 941 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Billy Bread | 70% | 89 |
| #2 | Drugga | 60% | 138 |
| #3 | :> | 57% | 79 |
| #4 | focus | 56% | 94 |
| #5 | 1,000 Denials | 55% | 67 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | :> | 57% | 79 |
| #4 | focus | 56% | 94 |
| #5 | 1,000 Denials | 55% | 67 |
| #6 | dink | 55% | 115 |
| #7 | Lonely Potat | 51% | 141 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Drugga | 22 | 0.0080 |
| #2 | :> | 14 | 0.0088 |
| #3 | Lonely Potat | 13 | 0.0051 |
| #4 | 1,000 Denials | 13 | 0.0094 |
| #5 | dink | 8 | 0.0040 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Drugga | 485 | 0.18 | 12 min |
| #2 | 1,000 Denials | 398 | 0.29 | 11 min |
| #3 | :> | 282 | 0.18 | 7 min |
| #4 | Billy Bread | 276 | 0.17 | 8 min |
| #5 | focus | 238 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M I L K | +4.69 | 90 | 45 |
| #2 | Billy Bread | +2.05 | 69 | 63 |
| #3 | dink | +1.66 | 92 | 51 |
| #4 | :> | +1.02 | 77 | 53 |
| #5 | Drugga | +1.00 | 74 | 61 |





