








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 60 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
470 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,160 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 242 | 21% |
| Smokes | 241 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 332 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 345 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $125,071 of utility $153 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 19 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | stebbiC0C0 | 100% | 2 |
| #2 | Dónakarl | 100% | 2 |
| #3 | rattikiller kony2012☂ | 100% | 2 |
| #4 | zR1 | 100% | 2 |
| #5 | allee** | 100% | 2 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #17 | ♥ JWalker ♥ | 50% | 2 |
| #18 | _XD_XD_XD_XD_XD_XD_XD_XD_XD_ | 50% | 2 |
| #19 | Zolo | 50% | 2 |
| #20 | ADHD | 33% | 3 |
| #21 | vctrrr | 0% | 2 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RuflU | 8 | 0.0183 |
| #2 | Nonni | 3 | 0.0072 |
| #3 | nutella.com | 3 | 0.0303 |
| #4 | Stjáni Guli | 1 | 0.0182 |
| #5 | stebbiC0C0 | 1 | 0.0200 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RuflU | 110 | 0.25 | 3 min |
| #2 | EddezeNNN | 100 | 0.29 | 3 min |
| #3 | Nonni | 82 | 0.20 | 3 min |
| #4 | _XD_XD_XD_XD_XD_XD_XD_XD_XD_ | 27 | 0.56 | 1 min |
| #5 | ♥ JWalker ♥ | 17 | 0.31 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Stjáni Guli | +6.98 | 80 | 72 |
| #2 | e1nfalt | +6.14 | 79 | 63 |
| #3 | Disrespectfully Reclined | +4.98 | 79 | 75 |
| #4 | EddezeNNN | +4.68 | 90 | 67 |
| #5 | Dónakarl | +2.81 | 50 | 67 |





