








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 6 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 36 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
591 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,808 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 358 | 20% |
| Smokes | 503 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 609 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 338 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $150,577 of utility $119 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jon | 58% | 48 |
| #2 | LANTERN ROUGE | 53% | 47 |
| #3 | Jens | 52% | 46 |
| #4 | err0r` | 50% | 14 |
| #5 | Andija | 50% | 52 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jon | 58% | 48 |
| #2 | LANTERN ROUGE | 53% | 47 |
| #3 | Jens | 52% | 46 |
| #4 | err0r` | 50% | 14 |
| #5 | Andija | 50% | 52 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Andija | 3 | 0.0028 |
| #2 | Jens | 3 | 0.0030 |
| #3 | jon | 2 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | LANTERN ROUGE | 1 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Andija | 190 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| #2 | LANTERN ROUGE | 152 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #3 | Jens | 150 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #4 | jon | 102 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #5 | err0r` | 26 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jon | +1.05 | 73 | 62 |
| #2 | overli | -0.00 | 83 | 59 |
| #3 | Andija | -0.16 | 67 | 71 |
| #4 | Jens | -0.56 | 77 | 66 |
| #5 | LANTERN ROUGE | -0.90 | 52 | 51 |





