








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1836 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 730 matches | ||
| Faceit | 216 matches | ||
| Wingman | 87 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 50 matches | ||
| Renown | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 67 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




60 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
13170 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 46,398 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 16097 | 35% |
| Smokes | 11128 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 10301 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 8872 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,890,906 of utility $73 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 916 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dextrus | 61% | 89 |
| #2 | Atro✗ | 59% | 96 |
| #3 | нιgнℓαη∂єя | 59% | 100 |
| #4 | ✪ SmashDown | 58% | 135 |
| #5 | 阿爾賓暗黑 | 54% | 200 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | нιgнℓαη∂єя | 59% | 100 |
| #4 | ✪ SmashDown | 58% | 135 |
| #5 | 阿爾賓暗黑 | 54% | 200 |
| #6 | Chris_7117 | 52% | 71 |
| #7 | Pin Occhio | 50% | 106 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ SmashDown | 6 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | нιgнℓαη∂єя | 4 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | Dextrus | 4 | 0.0023 |
| #4 | Pin Occhio | 2 | 0.0009 |
| #5 | Atro✗ | 2 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 阿爾賓暗黑 | 636 | 0.15 | 15 min |
| #2 | Atro✗ | 550 | 0.26 | 13 min |
| #3 | нιgнℓαη∂єя | 309 | 0.14 | 8 min |
| #4 | ✪ SmashDown | 252 | 0.09 | 7 min |
| #5 | Dextrus | 230 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ SmashDown | +2.17 | 90 | 55 |
| #2 | Gerne | +1.54 | 77 | 65 |
| #3 | Atro✗ | +0.50 | 69 | 65 |
| #4 | нιgнℓαη∂єя | +0.34 | 60 | 65 |
| #5 | Dextrus | +0.05 | 68 | 58 |





