








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 602 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 176 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 78 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 76 matches | ||
| Wingman | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 44 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




57 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5457 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,755 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2124 | 15% |
| Smokes | 5814 | 42% |
| HE Grenades | 4020 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1797 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $943,439 of utility $77 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 318 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wollysound | 27 | 0.0118 |
| #2 | Stosses | 25 | 0.0043 |
| #3 | Sqsi | 14 | 0.0046 |
| #4 | Butterfisch | 13 | 0.0026 |
| #5 | PikiTv | 11 | 0.0032 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Butterfisch | 449 | 0.09 | 10 min |
| #2 | Stosses | 421 | 0.07 | 10 min |
| #3 | Jesus | 293 | 0.09 | 7 min |
| #4 | wollysound | 290 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #5 | Gabs | 289 | 0.12 | 7 min |





