








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1225 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 684 matches | ||
| Faceit | 123 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 24 matches | ||
| Wingman | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Renown | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 69 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




30 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
10211 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 30,848 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6232 | 20% |
| Smokes | 9034 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 6495 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 9087 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,560,031 of utility $131 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1110 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | j0di | 55% | 74 |
| #2 | Alterlai | 53% | 55 |
| #3 | Nef | 51% | 338 |
| #4 | Burd Pauperranger | 51% | 319 |
| #5 | Modifact | 50% | 306 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Modifact | 9 | 0.0014 |
| #2 | Rns#. | 7 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | Dimitri | 6 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | Nef | 4 | 0.0005 |
| #5 | NietKoel#. | 4 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Modifact | 556 | 0.09 | 17 min |
| #2 | Dimitri | 474 | 0.12 | 10 min |
| #3 | Rns#. | 305 | 0.08 | 9 min |
| #4 | Burd Pauperranger | 278 | 0.04 | 6 min |
| #5 | j0di | 264 | 0.17 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Alterlai | +2.35 | 86 | 53 |
| #2 | Dilly | +1.77 | 63 | 64 |
| #3 | Nef | +1.69 | 77 | 46 |
| #4 | j0di | +1.22 | 58 | 79 |
| #5 | Modifact | +0.19 | 75 | 72 |





