








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 416 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 164 matches | ||
| Premier | 87 matches | ||
| Wingman | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 55 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2177 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,373 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1937 | 17% |
| Smokes | 3672 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 2901 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 2863 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,280,459 of utility $168 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 69 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CHAZZ MICHAEL MICHAELS | 61% | 83 |
| #2 | Dybz | 57% | 106 |
| #3 | T0NY | 56% | 172 |
| #4 | KirkeFritzel | 54% | 65 |
| #5 | JemapelleCroissant | 53% | 80 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | JemapelleCroissant | 53% | 80 |
| #6 | bissE | 52% | 109 |
| #7 | Kimz | 51% | 35 |
| #8 | ULRIK.GL | 47% | 19 |
| #9 | Blackjesus^ | 35% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CHAZZ MICHAEL MICHAELS | 3 | 0.0017 |
| #2 | JemapelleCroissant | 3 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | bissE | 2 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | T0NY | 825 | 0.22 | 23 min |
| #2 | bissE | 340 | 0.15 | 9 min |
| #3 | CHAZZ MICHAEL MICHAELS | 240 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| #4 | JemapelleCroissant | 179 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #5 | Dybz | 145 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ULRIK.GL | +3.20 | 87 | 69 |
| #2 | Kimz | +2.70 | 82 | 73 |
| #3 | CHAZZ MICHAEL MICHAELS | +2.31 | 78 | 65 |
| #4 | T0NY | +1.81 | 59 | 74 |
| #5 | bissE | +1.02 | 78 | 69 |





