








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 407 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 207 matches | ||
| Faceit | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2961 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,155 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2980 | 29% |
| Smokes | 2635 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2425 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 2115 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $918,823 of utility $142 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 989 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nokia | 65% | 23 |
| #2 | SINI♡ | 61% | 56 |
| #3 | walle | 60% | 68 |
| #4 | キリンドクター | 58% | 125 |
| #5 | Tane | 54% | 74 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | キリンドクター | 13 | 0.0051 |
| #2 | Tane | 6 | 0.0039 |
| #3 | SINI♡ | 6 | 0.0053 |
| #4 | Baba Yaga | 5 | 0.0023 |
| #5 | Dr Morbius | 2 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | キリンドクター | 541 | 0.21 | 17 min |
| #2 | Baba Yaga | 361 | 0.16 | 11 min |
| #3 | Tane | 238 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #4 | hajonnutkengäntekijä | 217 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #5 | walle | 213 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tane | +3.04 | 86 | 63 |
| #2 | Nokia | +2.69 | 87 | 64 |
| #3 | Baba Yaga | +1.56 | 80 | 68 |
| #4 | キリンドクター | +1.07 | 65 | 76 |
| #5 | walle | +0.97 | 79 | 62 |





