








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 462 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 56 matches | ||
| Faceit | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2515 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,004 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1736 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1705 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1709 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1854 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $437,063 of utility $114 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 146 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | jchancE | 67% | 15 |
| #12 | Blossom | 64% | 11 |
| #13 | Don't Trip | 61% | 18 |
| #14 | Kasta | 59% | 17 |
| #15 | Walker | 56% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nguyen | 13 | 0.0135 |
| #2 | Champ | 7 | 0.0046 |
| #3 | Bunny | 7 | 0.0071 |
| #4 | josh シ | 6 | 0.0067 |
| #5 | seb-a-licious | 6 | 0.0070 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Champ | 246 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| #2 | seb-a-licious | 237 | 0.28 | 6 min |
| #3 | Bunny | 215 | 0.22 | 3 min |
| #4 | nguyen | 192 | 0.20 | 4 min |
| #5 | z0mb1e | 180 | 0.32 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | josh シ | +4.63 | 97 | 57 |
| #2 | z0mb1e | +3.60 | 83 | 61 |
| #3 | Don't Trip | +3.59 | 76 | 66 |
| #4 | jchancE | +3.57 | 85 | 67 |
| #5 | Grave | +3.31 | 82 | 61 |





