








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 290 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 82 matches | ||
| Faceit | 74 matches | ||
| Esplay | 13 matches | 2,006 | |
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2343 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,073 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1550 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1642 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1510 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1371 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $732,825 of utility $154 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 35 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kumbaya my lord | 64% | 22 |
| #2 | -sajk | 63% | 30 |
| #3 | Valp3n | 58% | 12 |
| #4 | Rebel friend | 54% | 54 |
| #5 | ♥︎Filip♥ | 53% | 47 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Wayne Glenzky | 53% | 19 |
| #7 | steve777 | 52% | 46 |
| #8 | 𝕺𝖓𝖎 | 50% | 56 |
| #9 | AgeLevererar | 47% | 30 |
| #10 | KarlRex | 40% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rebel friend | 4 | 0.0033 |
| #2 | steve777 | 4 | 0.0040 |
| #3 | kumbaya my lord | 3 | 0.0066 |
| #4 | Wayne Glenzky | 3 | 0.0076 |
| #5 | 𝕺𝖓𝖎 | 2 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♥︎Filip♥ | 207 | 0.20 | 7 min |
| #2 | 𝕺𝖓𝖎 | 205 | 0.18 | 6 min |
| #3 | steve777 | 195 | 0.19 | 5 min |
| #4 | Rebel friend | 144 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #5 | kumbaya my lord | 111 | 0.24 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kumbaya my lord | +7.99 | 92 | 73 |
| #2 | AgeLevererar | +1.26 | 88 | 61 |
| #3 | MartinS | +0.83 | 80 | 51 |
| #4 | Rebel friend | +0.62 | 79 | 50 |
| #5 | 𝕺𝖓𝖎 | -0.01 | 82 | 54 |





