








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1026 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 234 matches | ||
| Wingman | 107 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 81 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2464 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,584 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1837 | 24% |
| Smokes | 2254 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1917 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1576 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,648,425 of utility $221 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 216 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Flo | 51% | 99 |
| #2 | falco` | 50% | 58 |
| #3 | falco | 50% | 122 |
| #4 | Cartega | 49% | 120 |
| #5 | Flotek | 49% | 230 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Flo | 585 | 0.28 | 14 min |
| #2 | trash | 432 | 0.15 | 12 min |
| #3 | Flotek | 341 | 0.08 | 9 min |
| #4 | p i v o o o | 303 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| #5 | Cartega | 244 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | falco | +2.29 | 64 | 43 |
| #2 | Flotek | +1.86 | 77 | 61 |
| #3 | Cartega | +1.28 | 57 | 70 |
| #4 | Shiro | +0.37 | 66 | 61 |
| #5 | p i v o o o | +0.13 | 66 | 64 |





