










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 155 matches | ||
| Wingman | 75 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2512 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,052 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1983 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1699 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 2787 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 1583 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $708,468 of utility $133 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 159 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cartega | 56% | 63 |
| #2 | falco | 55% | 69 |
| #3 | Shiro | 54% | 46 |
| #4 | falco` | 54% | 46 |
| #5 | CtrlMjollnir | 51% | 63 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Flo | 49% | 88 |
| #7 | HasH | 49% | 230 |
| #8 | BingChillin | 47% | 17 |
| #9 | trash | 43% | 76 |
| #10 | p i v o o o | 41% | 111 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HasH | 4 | 0.0009 |
| #2 | Flo | 2 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | p i v o o o | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #4 | trash | 1 | 0.0006 |
| #5 | falco | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Flo | 500 | 0.26 | 12 min |
| #2 | p i v o o o | 258 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #3 | trash | 208 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| #4 | HasH | 184 | 0.04 | 4 min |
| #5 | Cartega | 123 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Flotek | +1.62 | 78 | 59 |
| #2 | falco | +1.00 | 61 | 36 |
| #3 | Shiro | +0.89 | 64 | 61 |
| #4 | p i v o o o | +0.19 | 63 | 65 |
| #5 | Cartega | +0.16 | 56 | 71 |





