








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 190 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 144 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 45 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1709 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,259 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2395 | 20% |
| Smokes | 3691 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 3151 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 3022 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $237,688 of utility $47 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 107 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jiimmy_b | 68% | 31 |
| #2 | kurwa | 65% | 31 |
| #3 | King Clap | 61% | 31 |
| #4 | Superkai64 | 56% | 25 |
| #5 | Fence | 55% | 88 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rickyisms | 15 | 0.0070 |
| #2 | Fence | 15 | 0.0080 |
| #3 | Jiimmy_b | 10 | 0.0152 |
| #4 | kurwa | 8 | 0.0125 |
| #5 | King Clap | 3 | 0.0052 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rickyisms | 283 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| #2 | Fence | 153 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #3 | kurwa | 102 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #4 | King Clap | 96 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #5 | Jiimmy_b | 82 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Superkai64 | +4.80 | 84 | 74 |
| #2 | kurwa | +4.62 | 84 | 71 |
| #3 | Jiimmy_b | +2.22 | 85 | 59 |
| #4 | dannyjf | +1.69 | 68 | 63 |
| #5 | Fence | +0.72 | 65 | 59 |





