








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 152 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
586 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,305 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 381 | 17% |
| Smokes | 701 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 675 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 548 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $140,317 of utility $113 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 21 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | daddy cool | 100% | 4 |
| #2 | ørly ;. | 75% | 4 |
| #3 | Dr. Leary | 67% | 3 |
| #4 | NARUTO | 65% | 17 |
| #5 | h3ll | 64% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Zyloom | 50% | 4 |
| #10 | MnKr_ | 50% | 20 |
| #11 | mat | 43% | 7 |
| #12 | 3D2YSilveR | 40% | 5 |
| #13 | Helmi | 36% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MnKr_ | 1 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | v0uny ;. | 1 | 0.0098 |
| #3 | Dr. Leary | 1 | 0.0152 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bavy | 93 | 0.26 | 2 min |
| #2 | JörgiSAN_ | 89 | 0.27 | 2 min |
| #3 | MnKr_ | 62 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #4 | NARUTO | 53 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #5 | Zyloom | 39 | 0.43 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | v0uny ;. | +3.66 | 56 | 65 |
| #2 | daddy cool | +2.66 | 75 | 36 |
| #3 | h3ll | +1.62 | 78 | 48 |
| #4 | swemasterx | +1.55 | 81 | 56 |
| #5 | NARUTO | +1.26 | 47 | 70 |





