








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 255 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 91 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1263 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,262 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1185 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1392 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1411 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 1274 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $270,398 of utility $105 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 308 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | smooth | 71% | 14 |
| #2 | SwemasterX | 65% | 17 |
| #3 | 3D2YSilveR | 60% | 20 |
| #4 | h3ll | 56% | 85 |
| #5 | mat | 56% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Helmi | 54% | 37 |
| #7 | bavy | 51% | 41 |
| #8 | MnKr_ | 50% | 56 |
| #9 | VentL_ | 48% | 52 |
| #10 | NanuX | 47% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | VentL_ | 2 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | h3ll | 1 | 0.0005 |
| #3 | MnKr_ | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | VentL_ | 284 | 0.25 | 6 min |
| #2 | bavy | 218 | 0.24 | 5 min |
| #3 | MnKr_ | 163 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #4 | 3D2YSilveR | 145 | 0.33 | 3 min |
| #5 | h3ll | 135 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | OFENMEISTER | +2.30 | 56 | 69 |
| #2 | SwemasterX | +1.90 | 85 | 59 |
| #3 | NanuX | +1.46 | 89 | 69 |
| #4 | smooth | +0.93 | 73 | 41 |
| #5 | h3ll | +0.22 | 71 | 55 |





