








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 385 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 166 matches | ||
| Premier | 9 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2175 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,313 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4527 | 34% |
| Smokes | 2878 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 2804 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 3104 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $172,155 of utility $39 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 371 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mat | 68% | 19 |
| #2 | Helmi | 63% | 19 |
| #3 | SwemasterX | 56% | 16 |
| #4 | MnKr_ | 54% | 59 |
| #5 | h3ll | 54% | 59 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #13 | Timo die Aim Lockomotive | 44% | 16 |
| #14 | robznetix | 43% | 40 |
| #15 | IamDropZ | 40% | 10 |
| #16 | ► Kevin ◄ | 38% | 21 |
| #17 | Grâm | 29% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | h3ll | 1 | 0.0008 |
| #2 | agee- | 1 | 0.0008 |
| #3 | OFENMEISTER | 1 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | agee- | 298 | 0.23 | 7 min |
| #2 | VentL_ | 174 | 0.19 | 3 min |
| #3 | MnKr_ | 160 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #4 | OFENMEISTER | 154 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| #5 | robznetix | 119 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | OFENMEISTER | +1.48 | 55 | 67 |
| #2 | NanuX | +1.19 | 90 | 67 |
| #3 | SwemasterX | +1.01 | 83 | 56 |
| #4 | MnKr_ | +0.96 | 85 | 59 |
| #5 | n1ck | +0.93 | 90 | 51 |





