








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 55 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 341 matches | ||
| Faceit | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3431 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,071 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6615 | 31% |
| Smokes | 6508 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 4077 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 3871 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $731,705 of utility $84 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 5 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Hazza | 50% | 107 |
| #7 | PASCAL | 49% | 291 |
| #8 | Gummi | 45% | 31 |
| #9 | Likeabossow | 38% | 72 |
| #10 | SEB | 36% | 59 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PASCAL | 9 | 0.0014 |
| #2 | LilSwe | 4 | 0.0077 |
| #3 | Hazza | 2 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | Likeabossow | 1 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | Langskytten | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PASCAL | 1158 | 0.19 | 27 min |
| #2 | Hazza | 318 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #3 | GreenVirus | 158 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #4 | LilSwe | 112 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| #5 | Haxum | 100 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Langskytten | +4.05 | 81 | 59 |
| #2 | Haxum | +1.51 | 75 | 55 |
| #3 | Hazza | +0.80 | 66 | 63 |
| #4 | SEB | +0.35 | 58 | 48 |
| #5 | PASCAL | -0.34 | 64 | 62 |





