








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 450 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 192 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 66 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 40 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3985 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,586 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3029 | 19% |
| Smokes | 4057 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 4909 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 3591 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,334,152 of utility $154 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 83 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #12 | eRDwOw | 42% | 53 |
| #13 | tENZA | 41% | 133 |
| #14 | k1nG. <3 | 38% | 29 |
| #15 | dOwNeY | 33% | 36 |
| #16 | alphawho? | 32% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | eRDwOw | 5 | 0.0044 |
| #2 | hr.Ryw0w | 4 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | alphawho? | 4 | 0.0052 |
| #4 | tENZA | 3 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | ricK | 3 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hr.Ryw0w | 295 | 0.20 | 7 min |
| #2 | schRsch | 176 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #3 | ricK | 117 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #4 | eRDwOw | 113 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #5 | tENZA | 106 | 0.04 | 3 min |





