








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 697 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 548 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 85 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Renown | 1 match | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 71 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




31 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6000 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 37,460 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10895 | 29% |
| Smokes | 10953 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 7625 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 7987 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,554,303 of utility $95 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 361 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ProNighT | 58% | 155 |
| #2 | SM1LE | 56% | 41 |
| #3 | schRsch | 52% | 86 |
| #4 | Obi-LAN Kenobi | 51% | 55 |
| #5 | eRDwOw | 49% | 404 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | jackass | 48% | 64 |
| #7 | tENZA | 48% | 411 |
| #8 | ricK | 48% | 121 |
| #9 | matra | 43% | 72 |
| #10 | ennec | 41% | 59 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | eRDwOw | 27 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | tENZA | 7 | 0.0008 |
| #3 | ProNighT | 5 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | SM1LE | 5 | 0.0057 |
| #5 | ricK | 4 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | eRDwOw | 940 | 0.11 | 26 min |
| #2 | ProNighT | 743 | 0.24 | 19 min |
| #3 | tENZA | 380 | 0.04 | 10 min |
| #4 | ricK | 321 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #5 | schRsch | 254 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ennec | +1.74 | 71 | 76 |
| #2 | tENZA | +1.62 | 78 | 60 |
| #3 | SM1LE | +1.12 | 61 | 68 |
| #4 | hr.Ryw0w | +0.56 | 65 | 68 |
| #5 | ricK | +0.20 | 78 | 62 |





