








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 975 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 325 matches | ||
| Faceit | 125 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 38 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3838 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,514 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7530 | 35% |
| Smokes | 6111 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 3909 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 3964 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,115,769 of utility $154 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 196 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hfxits☬ | 78% | 37 |
| #2 | beLieve.! | 76% | 42 |
| #3 | ☬Gioo | 76% | 41 |
| #4 | Pipo ☬ | 74% | 31 |
| #5 | monohaki | 74% | 53 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Pipo ☬ | 74% | 31 |
| #5 | monohaki | 74% | 53 |
| #6 | Alaric Dell ☬ | 72% | 108 |
| #7 | Pancho_Villa | 68% | 44 |
| #8 | FinnnN ✝ | 55% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Alaric Dell ☬ | 4 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | monohaki | 1 | 0.0008 |
| #3 | Pancho_Villa | 1 | 0.0010 |
| #4 | beLieve.! | 1 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | hfxits☬ | 1 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Alaric Dell ☬ | 326 | 0.15 | 10 min |
| #2 | monohaki | 212 | 0.18 | 6 min |
| #3 | ☬Gioo | 146 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #4 | Pancho_Villa | 125 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #5 | beLieve.! | 78 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Alaric Dell ☬ | +2.20 | 77 | 81 |
| #2 | hfxits☬ | +1.87 | 70 | 64 |
| #3 | ☬Gioo | +1.75 | 72 | 72 |
| #4 | beLieve.! | +1.36 | 66 | 72 |
| #5 | Pancho_Villa | +1.25 | 68 | 63 |





