








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 380 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 437 matches | ||
| Faceit | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 37 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




31 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7183 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,391 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4988 | 35% |
| Smokes | 3794 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2568 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 3041 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,402,198 of utility $209 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2757 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Freshly shitted underwear | 56% | 90 |
| #2 | Unsnappy | 55% | 112 |
| #3 | $upahh | 54% | 97 |
| #4 | cory | 52% | 31 |
| #5 | aesor | 49% | 156 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | masor | 47% | 105 |
| #10 | 520 | 46% | 114 |
| #11 | Gab | 44% | 293 |
| #12 | Evan | 44% | 101 |
| #13 | hdzywOo | 44% | 108 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zahzi | 15 | 0.0030 |
| #2 | Richter | 11 | 0.0051 |
| #3 | Freshly shitted underwear | 11 | 0.0060 |
| #4 | aesor | 10 | 0.0031 |
| #5 | stm | 8 | 0.0033 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zahzi | 773 | 0.15 | 22 min |
| #2 | Freshly shitted underwear | 631 | 0.34 | 16 min |
| #3 | $upahh | 425 | 0.21 | 11 min |
| #4 | aesor | 337 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #5 | Evan | 334 | 0.16 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Richter | +2.33 | 86 | 59 |
| #2 | masor | +2.28 | 85 | 63 |
| #3 | Freshly shitted underwear | +1.56 | 82 | 71 |
| #4 | eoN | +1.47 | 87 | 64 |
| #5 | Unsnappy | +1.13 | 73 | 64 |





