








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 138 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 323 matches | ||
| Faceit | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5655 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,855 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4702 | 32% |
| Smokes | 3631 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 3749 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2773 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,405,021 of utility $138 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 739 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zahzi | 67% | 43 |
| #2 | masor | 62% | 61 |
| #3 | 520 | 60% | 58 |
| #4 | Hartmann Ibolya <3 | 58% | 31 |
| #5 | eoN | 55% | 112 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hartmann Ibolya <3 | 13 | 0.0210 |
| #2 | eoN | 12 | 0.0053 |
| #3 | Arrow | 10 | 0.0029 |
| #4 | Richter | 10 | 0.0044 |
| #5 | Dangles -qwop- | 8 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Freshly shitted underwear | 456 | 0.30 | 13 min |
| #2 | Arrow | 448 | 0.13 | 11 min |
| #3 | Richter | 346 | 0.15 | 10 min |
| #4 | eoN | 328 | 0.14 | 10 min |
| #5 | Dangles -qwop- | 282 | 0.07 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hartmann Ibolya <3 | +4.21 | 90 | 59 |
| #2 | Dangles -qwop- | +3.14 | 78 | 69 |
| #3 | masor | +2.36 | 85 | 67 |
| #4 | Unsnappy | +2.24 | 70 | 63 |
| #5 | Richter | +2.16 | 82 | 57 |





