








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 56 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 62 matches | ||
| Faceit | 16 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
803 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,233 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 210 | 9% |
| Smokes | 660 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 662 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 701 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $751,497 of utility $239 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 31 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | HajeN^ | 50% | 8 |
| #6 | Xaren | 48% | 79 |
| #7 | Trollaren | 47% | 79 |
| #8 | RobbanJS | 46% | 96 |
| #9 | ☁ walle | 36% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Trollaren | 14 | 0.0086 |
| #2 | RobbanJS | 7 | 0.0036 |
| #3 | MenSoft | 3 | 0.0034 |
| #4 | Xaren | 1 | 0.0006 |
| #5 | ✪ ds!Gn | 1 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Trollaren | 239 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #2 | RobbanJS | 228 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #3 | ✪ ds!Gn | 83 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #4 | MenSoft | 69 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #5 | Xaren | 60 | 0.04 | 1 min |





