








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 277 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 493 matches | ||
| Premier | 135 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 86 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7401 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 49,350 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 14493 | 29% |
| Smokes | 12997 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 12036 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 9824 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,265,737 of utility $77 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 42 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Joseph Fritzl | 62% | 52 |
| #2 | +Zeeerix@ | 60% | 80 |
| #3 | HlNe | 60% | 67 |
| #4 | Donas dreng | 59% | 74 |
| #5 | BlobChok | 53% | 74 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Donas dreng | +4.87 | 73 | 71 |
| #2 | +Zeeerix@ | +2.51 | 63 | 80 |
| #3 | Bandit^5 ♿ | +0.96 | 53 | 84 |
| #4 | Semper | +0.89 | 63 | 78 |
| #5 | HlNe | +0.65 | 66 | 64 |





