








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 354 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 192 matches | ||
| Premier | 172 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 49 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4022 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,873 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8201 | 33% |
| Smokes | 5435 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 6056 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 5181 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $872,644 of utility $85 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 357 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Bandit^5 ♿ | 49% | 117 |
| #9 | BlobChok | 46% | 26 |
| #10 | Bot_Sta3rk3 | 44% | 25 |
| #11 | Simse | 44% | 57 |
| #12 | LassevLam | 42% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Joseph Fritzl | 9 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | Donas dreng | 8 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | Fismann_ | 4 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | Bandit^5 ♿ | 2 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | Br00k^ | | 2 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fismann_ | 845 | 0.19 | 26 min |
| #2 | Donas dreng | 466 | 0.11 | 14 min |
| #3 | Bandit^5 ♿ | 442 | 0.17 | 13 min |
| #4 | NizoN | 279 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| #5 | Br00k^ | | 205 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Donas dreng | +4.06 | 70 | 73 |
| #2 | Simse | +2.53 | 73 | 74 |
| #3 | Zer0JaB | +0.82 | 65 | 66 |
| #4 | Bandit^5 ♿ | +0.33 | 48 | 84 |
| #5 | Semper | +0.23 | 60 | 76 |





