








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 239 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 227 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2670 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,638 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2058 | 24% |
| Smokes | 2663 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 2143 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1774 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,056,226 of utility $178 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 33 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SpennyS | 63% | 27 |
| #2 | Meat Cube | 56% | 87 |
| #3 | Wook | 55% | 40 |
| #4 | J Sauce | 54% | 153 |
| #5 | DeeWuu | 54% | 115 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Wook | 55% | 40 |
| #4 | J Sauce | 54% | 153 |
| #5 | DeeWuu | 54% | 115 |
| #6 | sil | 47% | 47 |
| #7 | Chen | 44% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | J Sauce | 8 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | DeeWuu | 4 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | Meat Cube | 3 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | Chen | 3 | 0.0055 |
| #5 | SpennyS | 3 | 0.0058 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Meat Cube | 393 | 0.22 | 10 min |
| #2 | J Sauce | 309 | 0.10 | 9 min |
| #3 | DeeWuu | 255 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #4 | sil | 199 | 0.19 | 5 min |
| #5 | SpennyS | 107 | 0.21 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DeeWuu | +2.10 | 68 | 58 |
| #2 | J Sauce | +1.71 | 82 | 54 |
| #3 | SpennyS | +0.28 | 61 | 61 |
| #4 | rat | +0.00 | 52 | 60 |
| #5 | sil | -0.04 | 79 | 64 |





