








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 25 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 111 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1539 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,378 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1094 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1406 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 943 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 935 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $420,645 of utility $118 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 10 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LickMyBraces | 80% | 10 |
| #2 | hOAKEEEEEEE | 54% | 97 |
| #3 | Zeri(o)X | 48% | 94 |
| #4 | Strillee | 48% | 82 |
| #5 | c0Ntr0L | 48% | 82 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Zeri(o)X | 48% | 94 |
| #4 | Strillee | 48% | 82 |
| #5 | c0Ntr0L | 48% | 82 |
| #6 | *Lil*Nudle* | 35% | 57 |
| #7 | pablo | 31% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | c0Ntr0L | 3 | 0.0017 |
| #2 | hOAKEEEEEEE | 2 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | Zeri(o)X | 2 | 0.0010 |
| #4 | Strillee | 1 | 0.0006 |
| #5 | *Lil*Nudle* | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hOAKEEEEEEE | 306 | 0.15 | 10 min |
| #2 | Zeri(o)X | 287 | 0.14 | 9 min |
| #3 | Strillee | 184 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #4 | *Lil*Nudle* | 117 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #5 | c0Ntr0L | 66 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Strillee | +3.59 | 89 | 55 |
| #2 | JS | +0.01 | 68 | 61 |
| #3 | *Lil*Nudle* | -0.25 | 62 | 65 |
| #4 | Zeri(o)X | -0.42 | 76 | 64 |
| #5 | c0Ntr0L | -0.64 | 63 | 53 |





