








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 308 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 187 matches | ||
| Premier | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1819 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,003 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1394 | 15% |
| Smokes | 2738 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 2733 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 2138 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $833,890 of utility $164 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 394 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Toshii :> | 83% | 23 |
| #2 | Flown | 66% | 104 |
| #3 | NeXT - ogdans3 | 60% | 166 |
| #4 | Potetsalat | 59% | 22 |
| #5 | teddy | 59% | 61 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | aj | 58% | 169 |
| #8 | Fruktsalat | 57% | 173 |
| #9 | Snellingen | 56% | 57 |
| #10 | js | 56% | 50 |
| #11 | wekonz | 50% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fruktsalat | 7 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | Flown | 5 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | aj | 3 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | js | 2 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | NeXT - ogdans3 | 1 | 0.0003 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aj | 1189 | 0.34 | 41 min |
| #2 | NeXT - ogdans3 | 598 | 0.16 | 17 min |
| #3 | Fruktsalat | 484 | 0.13 | 13 min |
| #4 | js | 224 | 0.23 | 7 min |
| #5 | Flown | 183 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wiik | +2.14 | 89 | 63 |
| #2 | aj | +1.93 | 72 | 83 |
| #3 | Flown | +1.78 | 76 | 64 |
| #4 | Toshii :> | +1.31 | 61 | 57 |
| #5 | teddy | +0.92 | 60 | 75 |





