








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 597 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 665 matches | ||
| Faceit | 88 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 88 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




36 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5537 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 38,327 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9781 | 26% |
| Smokes | 9880 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 10112 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 8554 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,262,534 of utility $73 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1277 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #12 | Meggala | 46% | 182 |
| #13 | Gangrene | 45% | 164 |
| #14 | Sika | 44% | 43 |
| #15 | Pyssyh | 44% | 64 |
| #16 | βͺ dome | 33% | 55 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gangrene | 9 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | Hullukukko | 8 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | βπ²π²ππ’π―π±π± β | 7 | 0.0007 |
| #4 | Meggala | 6 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | pentti kΓΆyri | 5 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Meggala | 540 | 0.14 | 16 min |
| #2 | DrGerhard1 | 534 | 0.39 | 14 min |
| #3 | Hullukukko | 497 | 0.08 | 14 min |
| #4 | pentti kΓΆyri | 436 | 0.13 | 10 min |
| #5 | βπ²π²ππ’π―π±π± β | 322 | 0.03 | 11 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pAtOnKiJaLkAsHeNkOViTcH | +2.91 | 58 | 63 |
| #2 | Eetu! "# | +2.65 | 83 | 54 |
| #3 | DrGerhard1 | +2.47 | 50 | 72 |
| #4 | Reddiethylamine | +1.94 | 58 | 59 |
| #5 | Hattutehdas Oy | +1.70 | 61 | 58 |





