








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1891 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 640 matches | ||
| Faceit | 67 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 174 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7088 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 23,690 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4226 | 18% |
| Smokes | 3996 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 7703 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 7765 | 33% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,798,668 of utility $234 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 353 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Areoon | 59% | 59 |
| #2 | Fibus | 54% | 114 |
| #3 | Udo | 49% | 364 |
| #4 | raveN` | 49% | 334 |
| #5 | Яotari | 48% | 458 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Udo | 24 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | Testament78 | 21 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | Яotari | 9 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | raveN` | 9 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | Fibus | 4 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Testament78 | 1931 | 0.13 | 52 min |
| #2 | raveN` | 1215 | 0.17 | 36 min |
| #3 | Яotari | 596 | 0.06 | 19 min |
| #4 | Udo | 574 | 0.07 | 16 min |
| #5 | f1Ne' | 183 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fibus | +1.81 | 60 | 53 |
| #2 | exe | +1.59 | 60 | 69 |
| #3 | Яotari | +1.54 | 74 | 55 |
| #4 | raveN` | +0.90 | 72 | 68 |
| #5 | ✠ Uwe ist auch dabei ✠ | +0.24 | 53 | 63 |





