








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 556 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 26 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4963 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,446 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5155 | 27% |
| Smokes | 6039 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 3882 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 4370 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $699,754 of utility $78 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1206 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Resting Manatee | 49% | 272 |
| #2 | beko | 45% | 146 |
| #3 | Booj | 45% | 105 |
| #4 | Jester | 43% | 281 |
| #5 | mariopees | 39% | 295 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | beko | 45% | 146 |
| #3 | Booj | 45% | 105 |
| #4 | Jester | 43% | 281 |
| #5 | mariopees | 39% | 295 |
| #6 | Mr. Frizør | 37% | 228 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jester | 11 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | mariopees | 10 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | Resting Manatee | 10 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | Booj | 5 | 0.0023 |
| #5 | Mr. Frizør | 4 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | beko | 724 | 0.25 | 15 min |
| #2 | mariopees | 513 | 0.09 | 9 min |
| #3 | Resting Manatee | 477 | 0.09 | 12 min |
| #4 | Jester | 224 | 0.04 | 5 min |
| #5 | Booj | 126 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Billy Busted | +2.58 | 68 | 70 |
| #2 | beko | +1.81 | 80 | 63 |
| #3 | Jester | +1.17 | 56 | 41 |
| #4 | Resting Manatee | +0.49 | 77 | 62 |
| #5 | Booj | -0.37 | 42 | 54 |





