








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 797 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 386 matches | ||
| Faceit | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 14 matches | ||
| Wingman | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 49 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5862 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,264 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6490 | 36% |
| Smokes | 4640 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 4171 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2963 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,950,360 of utility $174 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 654 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Trash | 60% | 47 |
| #2 | bjork | 55% | 64 |
| #3 | ✪ ηiino ◢◤ | 54% | 138 |
| #4 | LjugareN^® | 53% | 70 |
| #5 | AweeP | 51% | 311 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AweeP | 8 | 0.0012 |
| #2 | ✪ Lindberg ツ | 8 | 0.0082 |
| #3 | bäri | 5 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | ✪ ηiino ◢◤ | 3 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | Dorkan | 1 | 0.0005 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AweeP | 1088 | 0.17 | 35 min |
| #2 | ✪ ηiino ◢◤ | 610 | 0.23 | 18 min |
| #3 | bäri | 459 | 0.10 | 11 min |
| #4 | Dorkan | 370 | 0.17 | 10 min |
| #5 | bjork | 275 | 0.20 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bjork | +2.91 | 85 | 69 |
| #2 | ✪ ηiino ◢◤ | +2.45 | 91 | 80 |
| #3 | Dorkan | +1.46 | 73 | 70 |
| #4 | AweeP | +0.55 | 63 | 77 |
| #5 | sensie | +0.50 | 67 | 66 |





