








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 659 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 502 matches | ||
| Faceit | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 58 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4078 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,104 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2730 | 21% |
| Smokes | 5614 | 43% |
| HE Grenades | 2176 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 2584 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,516,425 of utility $217 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 71 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nFR | 64% | 39 |
| #2 | PhymosisBirkenau | 58% | 55 |
| #3 | Qussay | 55% | 165 |
| #4 | kronos | 54% | 181 |
| #5 | BBniccccccc | 49% | 197 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | PhymosisBirkenau | 58% | 55 |
| #3 | Qussay | 55% | 165 |
| #4 | kronos | 54% | 181 |
| #5 | BBniccccccc | 49% | 197 |
| #6 | Jesus of Nazarekt | 49% | 94 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BBniccccccc | 5 | 0.0012 |
| #2 | kronos | 5 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | Qussay | 4 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | Jesus of Nazarekt | 1 | 0.0005 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BBniccccccc | 234 | 0.05 | 6 min |
| #2 | Qussay | 213 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| #3 | Jesus of Nazarekt | 191 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #4 | PhymosisBirkenau | 184 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| #5 | kronos | 179 | 0.05 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kronos | +2.59 | 82 | 60 |
| #2 | nFR | +2.45 | 72 | 74 |
| #3 | PhymosisBirkenau | +2.24 | 74 | 73 |
| #4 | Qussay | +0.30 | 66 | 52 |
| #5 | BBniccccccc | -0.33 | 62 | 53 |





