








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 238 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 365 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 47 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




75 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5611 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,989 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5413 | 29% |
| Smokes | 5466 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 4281 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 3829 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,606,861 of utility $142 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 877 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lou le petit caillou | 70% | 37 |
| #2 | AmNeXiA | 60% | 60 |
| #3 | freddd | 58% | 55 |
| #4 | Jesus of Nazarekt | 58% | 62 |
| #5 | Kerani | 56% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Qussay | 56% | 73 |
| #7 | kronos | 55% | 66 |
| #8 | Skaralth | 51% | 35 |
| #9 | Inarek | 51% | 87 |
| #10 | BBniccccccc | 43% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kerani | 22 | 0.0303 |
| #2 | Lou le petit caillou | 18 | 0.0261 |
| #3 | Inarek | 12 | 0.0072 |
| #4 | AmNeXiA | 3 | 0.0025 |
| #5 | Qussay | 2 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Inarek | 196 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #2 | Kerani | 144 | 0.20 | 3 min |
| #3 | AmNeXiA | 116 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #4 | Lou le petit caillou | 111 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #5 | Jesus of Nazarekt | 98 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kerani | +2.69 | 87 | 60 |
| #2 | Lou le petit caillou | +2.50 | 84 | 56 |
| #3 | PhymosisBirkenau | +2.44 | 75 | 65 |
| #4 | kronos | +1.35 | 87 | 53 |
| #5 | Skaralth | +0.97 | 76 | 74 |





