








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 141 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
552 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,874 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 555 | 30% |
| Smokes | 503 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 301 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 515 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $135,885 of utility $125 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 11 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AgentShield | 4 | 0.0059 |
| #2 | 1ce | 1 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | Dayne | 1 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 1ce | 179 | 0.19 | 5 min |
| #2 | AgentShield | 112 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #3 | Dayne | 69 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| #4 | ToxicBullet | 52 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #5 | Zyuwu | 24 | 0.40 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | speed | +3.76 | 66 | 55 |
| #2 | Wojo | +1.86 | 75 | 67 |
| #3 | Dayne | +1.59 | 78 | 61 |
| #4 | AgentShield | +0.78 | 62 | 55 |
| #5 | 1ce | -0.56 | 33 | 63 |





