








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 92 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 22 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1323 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,966 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1842 | 37% |
| Smokes | 1730 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 1117 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 277 | 6% |
Our logs show you have wasted $463,338 of utility $87 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 44 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | smokey_psyduck | 58% | 38 |
| #2 | Lime Juice | 52% | 112 |
| #3 | Azz | 49% | 166 |
| #4 | SaltMinerJohn | 45% | 53 |
| #5 | Beckerleg | 45% | 107 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Beckerleg | 45% | 107 |
| #6 | JellyJam #CZ GANG!!! | 44% | 70 |
| #7 | SIMOPS44 | 44% | 41 |
| #8 | Anonymous Prime | 43% | 21 |
| #9 | GeT_WeLsH | 36% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Azz | 8 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | Lime Juice | 8 | 0.0036 |
| #3 | Beckerleg | 4 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | SaltMinerJohn | 3 | 0.0027 |
| #5 | SIMOPS44 | 1 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lime Juice | 377 | 0.17 | 10 min |
| #2 | Beckerleg | 269 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #3 | Azz | 261 | 0.08 | 6 min |
| #4 | JellyJam #CZ GANG!!! | 93 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #5 | SaltMinerJohn | 78 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lime Juice | +3.90 | 86 | 64 |
| #2 | Beckerleg | +2.86 | 83 | 55 |
| #3 | Azz | +2.68 | 73 | 43 |
| #4 | Anonymous Prime | +0.57 | 72 | 50 |
| #5 | SaltMinerJohn | -0.68 | 29 | 53 |





