








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 412 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 212 matches | ||
| Wingman | 89 matches | ||
| Faceit | 70 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2620 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,153 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4635 | 38% |
| Smokes | 2840 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 2653 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 2025 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,375,193 of utility $168 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 210 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Femorale | 58% | 38 |
| #2 | mato | 54% | 81 |
| #3 | Karvapallero | 53% | 53 |
| #4 | vrum vrum | 50% | 24 |
| #5 | sam4vimes | 48% | 77 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wbr | 7 | 0.0016 |
| #2 | ayiaz | 5 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | sam4vimes | 5 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | Giquli | 5 | 0.0068 |
| #5 | mato | 3 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sonight | 501 | 0.15 | 13 min |
| #2 | ayiaz | 484 | 0.13 | 14 min |
| #3 | mato | 385 | 0.23 | 11 min |
| #4 | wbr | 314 | 0.07 | 9 min |
| #5 | sam4vimes | 279 | 0.18 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rotta | +2.93 | 62 | 69 |
| #2 | ayiaz | +2.07 | 58 | 75 |
| #3 | sam4vimes | +1.81 | 72 | 75 |
| #4 | Femorale | +1.22 | 73 | 68 |
| #5 | vrum vrum | +1.09 | 65 | 73 |





