








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 8 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 120 matches | ||
| Faceit | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2551 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,416 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2834 | 34% |
| Smokes | 1921 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1875 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1786 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $486,396 of utility $107 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 118 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Supply | 71% | 17 |
| #2 | Tosi | 69% | 16 |
| #3 | iTagZz | 65% | 23 |
| #4 | AkA | 61% | 23 |
| #5 | FLAGADA ツ | 59% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Marco Pyright | 48% | 67 |
| #9 | ✪ Lawid | 47% | 19 |
| #10 | Phûûcc✔ | 46% | 24 |
| #11 | Metr1ckZ | 45% | 20 |
| #12 | Ziva | 36% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Marco Pyright | 7 | 0.0050 |
| #2 | AkA | 4 | 0.0081 |
| #3 | Tosi | 4 | 0.0125 |
| #4 | Metr1ckZ | 3 | 0.0070 |
| #5 | Blunk | 2 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Blunk | 280 | 0.20 | 8 min |
| #2 | Marco Pyright | 159 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #3 | Phûûcc✔ | 147 | 0.30 | 4 min |
| #4 | SMECTA | 84 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #5 | iTagZz | 77 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Supply | +2.64 | 81 | 61 |
| #2 | SMECTA | +2.07 | 90 | 51 |
| #3 | Hoקe | +1.08 | 78 | 64 |
| #4 | Metr1ckZ | +0.97 | 83 | 49 |
| #5 | Tosi | +0.71 | 84 | 65 |





