








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 717 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 218 matches | ||
| Wingman | 117 matches | ||
| Faceit | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 36 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3244 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,746 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5401 | 29% |
| Smokes | 4994 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 3920 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 4431 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,017,475 of utility $121 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 580 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | k1nG. <3 | 47% | 248 |
| #2 | alphawho? | 46% | 228 |
| #3 | Shocky* | 46% | 225 |
| #4 | RYU//HYPED | 45% | 216 |
| #5 | kORNY | 45% | 253 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | k1nG. <3 | 47% | 248 |
| #2 | alphawho? | 46% | 228 |
| #3 | Shocky* | 46% | 225 |
| #4 | RYU//HYPED | 45% | 216 |
| #5 | kORNY | 45% | 253 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RYU//HYPED | 10 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | k1nG. <3 | 9 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | kORNY | 9 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | Shocky* | 8 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | alphawho? | 4 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | k1nG. <3 | 953 | 0.18 | 20 min |
| #2 | RYU//HYPED | 889 | 0.19 | 24 min |
| #3 | Shocky* | 676 | 0.14 | 16 min |
| #4 | alphawho? | 471 | 0.10 | 11 min |
| #5 | kORNY | 439 | 0.10 | 11 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RYU//HYPED | +1.84 | 71 | 76 |
| #2 | alphawho? | +0.90 | 75 | 62 |
| #3 | Shocky* | -0.11 | 54 | 72 |
| #4 | sparkYY | -0.63 | 74 | 72 |
| #5 | k1nG. <3 | -1.14 | 46 | 70 |





