








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 393 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 507 matches | ||
| Wingman | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 127 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




43 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3729 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,369 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6117 | 25% |
| Smokes | 7077 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 6603 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 4572 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,411,855 of utility $114 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 647 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Er Coyote | 50% | 42 |
| #2 | IVIP0WER ツ | 50% | 136 |
| #3 | Blaackthoven | 49% | 201 |
| #4 | Er Panda | 48% | 97 |
| #5 | Ingwë | 47% | 148 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Er Coyote | +2.92 | 65 | 46 |
| #2 | ingwee | +2.75 | 58 | 58 |
| #3 | Pedro Pichapiedra | +1.66 | 56 | 56 |
| #4 | Er Panda | +0.27 | 53 | 42 |
| #5 | Kerrick Onabo | +0.10 | 64 | 64 |





