








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 593 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 193 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




53 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5060 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,351 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7255 | 44% |
| Smokes | 3844 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 2822 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 2430 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,125,176 of utility $123 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 612 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | above | 74% | 35 |
| #2 | Jumpr | 74% | 27 |
| #3 | aspw0w | 70% | 44 |
| #4 | KUSHn1rgusta | 69% | 32 |
| #5 | Brisky | 68% | 63 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | R3VERSE | 65% | 112 |
| #8 | andYw0w~ | 59% | 120 |
| #9 | Le_Brotato | 57% | 174 |
| #10 | F 1 R E | 54% | 72 |
| #11 | KtXByE | 50% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Le_Brotato | 10 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | R3VERSE | 10 | 0.0045 |
| #3 | F 1 R E | 8 | 0.0056 |
| #4 | Brisky | 5 | 0.0038 |
| #5 | KUSHn1rgusta | 4 | 0.0062 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Le_Brotato | 705 | 0.20 | 22 min |
| #2 | R3VERSE | 574 | 0.26 | 13 min |
| #3 | F 1 R E | 357 | 0.25 | 8 min |
| #4 | Brisky | 227 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #5 | andYw0w~ | 204 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aspw0w | +4.85 | 83 | 71 |
| #2 | Brisky | +2.63 | 79 | 54 |
| #3 | R3VERSE | +2.58 | 73 | 58 |
| #4 | KUSHn1rgusta | +1.82 | 65 | 68 |
| #5 | booooooooooooooooooo | +1.55 | 82 | 68 |





